Cyber Lies: When Finding The Truth Matters

Cyber Lies: When Finding The Truth Matters
John Paul Lucich
Starpath Books
ISBN: 0-9774894-0-X
Non-Fiction, Computers, Relationships
Reviewed by Frederick Noronha

Computer security meets with relationships. Result? A book such as this, from computer forensic expert John Lucich. His point is, put simply: men and women cheat on their spouses at an alarming rate. How do you know if you are one of those in a "relationship with a cheater"?
In a foreword, author of 'Secret Lovers' Dr Luann Linquist says that secret time spent in chat rooms, Instant-Messaging (IM), frequent e-mails, quickie cell calls, and visits to
cheating and dating Internet websites "are as serious a threat to your relationship as a face-to-face, belly-to-belly affair". (The author seems less certain about this.)
Author Lucich, on the other hand, quotes Dr Lindquist talking about some "perceived benefits of affairs" -- while making clear she does not promote affairs. These include sexual and emotional satisfaction, new perceptions of the sex, added dimensions to sex, body or personality changes, and a sense of being in charge. But there are costs too -- guilt, pain, confusion, depression, loss of family or spouse, loneliness, a loss of reputation, and legal suits.
We're living in strange times. This book notes that close emotional ties often occur as two people share a struggle, help one another, or confide in each other.
But, as the author says, "I have seen emotional infidelity not only grow in the workplace, but also in online interaction -- Web forums, blogs, and just about any online community site where people can meet, interact, and learn about each other."
Linquist cautious you. Cyber Lies is not a handbook for repairing your marriage. It aims at ending what she calls the"cheat-by-deceit drama". Author Lucich asks you to read the
book carefully, cover to cover, and hints that it could help in the settlement.
Of its ten chapters, three deal with relationships and the rest largely with hard-core tech issues. First comes an introduction to the issue -- the tools, preparing yourself for action, and so on. Two chapters deal with infidelity and the internet.
Some sections of the book are ones you could encounter in any Windows text, though written with a focus on the book's theme. Chapter seven deals with cell phones, and chapter eight, on locating and analyzing email. All assume that the computer user is on the Microsoft Windows (TM) operating system.
We're told that Cyber Lies was "written for the spouse or parent who has limited knowledge of computers. It places the power of computer forensics in your hands, which will enable you to access and review data stored on computers or cell phones. Cyber Lies will educate and empower people to find the truth."
Somewhere along the way, the book gets rather tech and geeky. So, can we, do we, want to "find the truth"? Maybe it would help to expend more energies to ensure that relationships didn't end on this road. But if it's at the point of no return, then probably, just maybe, this book could help.